Last week was my first time on a new chemo drug. Thank you for your prayers and positive thoughts on my behalf! I’m grateful that it went smoothly, and we just have to iron out some kinks. For example, I normally get IV Ativan, which knocks me out. This time, they added the max dose of Benadryl to the mix (in case of an allergic reaction to the new drug). Wow. For two days afterward, I felt drugged and had a horrible headache. As I said, we have kinks to work out.
As expected, the rash has appeared on my face. I am supposed to stay out of the sun. I endure these New England winters so that I can enjoy a sunny, hot summer. I will now be spending much of it in A/C. Sigh.
The rash itself resembles acne more than a rash. I have stopped counting the white pussy things at 30, and I forgot how much pressure they put on your skin. Plus the ones that are just red are itchy, and my scalp is itchy as well. All of this is annoying but bearable, and I try not to look in the mirror too often.
The chemo drug itself leaves me feeling differently than the prior drugs – a little out of sync with the world around me. I suppose that will be my new normal and I will get used to it.
On the good news front: My energy level seems to be better. For example, on the prior chemo regimen, on Thursday nights, I was always asleep and mildly nauseous. This week, though, on Thursday night, I washed my car (with help from one of our sons). That never would have happened on my previous chemotherapy. Lemonade! And I have one more week before I head back.
My husband has known Harriet since they attended kindergarten together, though they didn’t stay in constant contact. Many years later, at their 25th high school reunion, I met Harriet and was instantly drawn to the angel inside her. I followed her around like a puppy dog – I loved being around her and breathing the same air.
We started off doing fun things together, like visiting with her family in Memphis and cheering her on as she ran a half-marathon in Nashville.
Then suddenly (looking back), my life took this weird medical turn. She came to Boston and sat with me during fertility treatments, and was there for me as we mourned a late miscarriage.
When our older son was born, she dropped everything and traveled to Indiana to take care of all of us – letting us know what baby things we would need, doing our laundry, getting food for us, watching the baby so we could sleep, filling us with confidence that we might just be able to do this parenting thing.
In the midst of getting her master’s degree, she helped to me heal after cancer surgeries, and held my hand during chemo sessions. She supported me without pity while I cried. When I craved a particular pair of leg warmers (with a complicated cable stitch), she knitted them, even though she had long ago put away her knitting needles and her fingers didn’t work as smoothly as they once did.
Of course, she’s woven fun into our visits, including the time she taught my kids to say, “Thank you for my lovely dinner. May I please be excused?” We still love that!
But last week – wow. I don’t know how to even BE with this, much less say it, but here goes. Harriet flew to Boston to be with her wonderful mother and sister as her mother passed away.
During the days that followed, when I should have been there for my friend, she appeared at Dana Farber to sit with me during blood draws, doctor visits, and chemotherapy.
It still brings tears to my eyes. Harriet is an angel on earth. She does God’s work as she lives and breathes.
I know that Harriet is unique. I also know that this is a big world. So I hope you can recognize the Harriet in your life. As much I appreciate her, it can never be enough.
Love and blessings,